Should We Go Back to Diapers at Night?

T here are a lot of reasons why Kaley, 23, doesn't go clubbing any more. For a start, it's too expensive, with taxis, door fees and alcohol to pay for. Plus the clubs, even in the capital, are disappointing: they shut at 2am, much earlier than venues in Berlin, and just when you start enjoying yourself it's lights on.

It's a similar story for Michelle, 24, who says she went out a lot at university but now she prefers chilling at home, and spends her cash on one-off big events such as festivals. "Everyone needs a night out, but it doesn't have to be in a club," she says.

These are just two stories sent to the Guardian in response to our survey asking millennials (those aged 18 to 35) about their relationship with a once treasured pastime: clubbing.

Studies suggest that today's young have fallen out of love with it, and in its latest trend report the Office of National Statistics dropped the price of nightclub admission from the list of common goods and services used to calculate inflation.

Hundreds of clubs have closed in recent years. The decline of nightclubbing has been attributed, in part, to the smoking ban, and to relaxed licensing laws that make bars and pubs more appealing. But it has also been suggested that many young people, like Michelle, now simply prefer a night in as opposed to a night out, meeting people via online dating platforms such as Tinder instead.

We received 196 responses to our call out on clubbing, with the vast majority (131) agreeing that a night in was now preferable to a night out. What's more, 70 people said generation Y was less interested in clubbing, compared with only 45 who said more. However, not everyone answered this question.

So, why are today's youth no longer keen on clubs? It's not necessarily what you might think: 98 respondents said that their generation was not less interested in face-to-face meet-ups because of the rise of social media (compared to 33 who said they were – again, not everyone responded to this question).

Here are some of the reasons millennials don't want to go out any more, in their own words:

It's too expensive

Many talked about the rising price of a night out. Lucy, 25, from London said: "Why be crammed in a sweaty club or be limited to a handful of mindless nightlife activities when I could be doing a lot more at home for less money, with greater cultural value and without the hassle of trekking out?"

And even those who do enjoy a night out accept that it is at least partly because it's still affordable where they live. Helen, 23, from Newcastle said: "I'm lucky to live in one of the few parts of the UK where a night out is still relatively affordable. A taxi in town will cost you no more than £10 and drinks are rarely more than £3 or £4. The nightclub scene is also more diverse in Newcastle, catering to more genres and age groups."

Harri, 27, from London pointed out that a night out now costs almost as much as a weekend away. " I think dancing and sweating gross amounts to loud music is good for the soul. But you can now get cheap city breaks for the price of a good night out that you won't remember in London. And city breaks look better on Instagram."

Clubs these days are rubbish

A lot of people slammed the fact that music is not what it used to be with Scin, 35, from Australia putting it quite succinctly, "I don't miss nightclubs because music is shit now."

Tom, 33, from London bemoaned the demise of once great clubbing venues: "Bouncers are always rude and aggressive with no cause; DJs usually play what they want not what people want to listen to; the drinks are overpriced. Last time I went to Fabric, the music was still good but I realised as I was walking out that I'd been robbed."

Many of those who responded also expressed a preference for big nights or festivals, where they could enjoy quality time with friends, rather than regular club experiences. Blaynos, 26, from London said: "I'd rather spend my money on going to try some new food rather than going to an overpriced nightclub, and spend my down days chilling at home with mates."

' Last time I went to Fabric the music was still good but I realised as I was walking out that I'd been robbed.'

Clubs are too impersonal

Rather than seeing themselves as a generation stuck staring at phones and not wanting to connect in real life, most of the young people who responded said that clubs were simply not personal enough. At the end of a long week they want to spend time with their friends, rather than shout over music at them.

Sarah, 30, from Bristol said: "I'd much rather make a plan and meet up with friends face to face rather than sit in separate rooms and talk over social media. I don't use Facebook any more and I think my friendships are better now I make the effort to catch-up with people properly...I love live music, and going to see bands play live is the main way to keep them in existence these days."

Harriet, 26, from Manchester said: "Having finished a masters recently, I'm suddenly in a city where there's not a lot of people I know around, so when I get to see my friends it's nice to sit down and chat with them rather than getting really drunk and not knowing what's going on with them. We're all working and busy so don't get to do the catch up stuff during the week."

Going out creates anxiety

There was a small majority who found the clubbing scene simply too stressful. Dave, 19, from York said: "I find even pubs to be overwhelming, so nightclubs are just awful with all the noise, sound and crowded people. It's much easier and more comfortable for me to talk to my friends on Skype or Facebook than to force myself into an uncomfortable and intimidating situation."

Abi, 24, from Bath agreed: "I find clubs totally overwhelming - I can't talk, people get lost or split off and it just generally ends up with me trying to find people rather than dancing ... staying in is more under my control."

Sirena, 25 said that while previous generations embraced hedonism and were willing to lose three days to a big night out, the desperation to meet all our self-imposed goals makes today's young feel like a night out is an outrageous indulgence. "Plus, I think time with friends is at more of a premium as working days become longer and cities are more sprawled."

Michael, 33, from Leicester said: "Life at home is far more relaxed nowadays so there isn't the push to get out of the house to talk to friends, and you can talk to anyone over the internet for free. Pre-social media and messenger services it would have cost a small fortune to stay in touch the way we do now."

Abi from Bath finds clubs totally overwhelming.

Safety and health concerns

There were issues that, perhaps understandably, affected women more than men. Ashley, 21, from London summed it up nicely when she said: "As a girl, going out to clubs can be quite annoying and sometimes scary if you constantly have to keep avoiding drunk people who may try to take advantage of you. I don't need to worry about that on a night in."

Mina, 19, from Walsall agreed: "Not going to a club means you're less likely to get your drink spiked or get chatted up by creep strangers. Instead, you can actually talk to your friends without shouting over music."

Mina, 19 from Walsall.

For some, health issues were also a factor. Alex, 27, from Essex said: "The reason we are less interested in clubbing is due to a combination of social media, being over-exposed and obsessed with how we want to be perceived to the outside (virtual) world. This stops us from letting our hair down for fear of candid photos being publicised online. There is also a lot of pressure to not drink, and not relax due to comparing ourselves to our peers with jobs, relationships, healthy lifestyles."

Alice, 28, from Manchester said: "There is a surge towards being healthy and a night of drinking is a real turn off. A few drinks with friends is nice but better to go out for food."

We are all too tired

The last reason given by many millennials? Exhaustion. This cropped up a lot, particularly among younger millennials still studying for their exams. Emily,18, from Solihull said: "I am working hard during the week for my A-levels and spend the majority of Saturday playing sport so when I have the chance to go out by Saturday evening I am too tired."

Leah, 18, from Newcastle agreed: "Going out is too much effort. I'd rather chill in and relax from the stress of studying. It's also a good time to catch up with the things I haven't had time to watch or listen to in the week. It's always too expensive to go out."

Brie, 21, from Sheffield was in a similar situation, and said that she cannot deal with a headache for a full morning as well as coping with university study. "A cuppa and biscuits in front of the telly is way more comfortable than waiting to be served in a club."

For older millennials, just as exhausting as work is trying to keep up with competition in the graduate market. Ruth, 22 from Edinburgh said: "With a competitive work environment and everyone looking for graduate jobs, I cannot imagine turning up to work hungover or tired on a weekday and still performing well enough to get ahead. Going to bars and clubs is too expensive, everyone's too busy worrying about whether they will ever be able to afford a mortgage or children to throw away money every week on a club."

• Some names have been changed

Should We Go Back to Diapers at Night?

Source: https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2016/mar/24/id-rather-chill-in-and-relax-why-millennials-dont-go-clubbing

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